Cute, Sexy, Beautiful, Lovely, or Gorgeous

Jin n Tonic being sexy

“Don’t call me cute.”


“Because I HATE being called cute. Call me sexy or beautiful, but anything but cute.”

She was wearing a black dress, one that showed off her lovely figure. She could have modeled in that dress. Heck, she should have modeled in that dress.

I remember this conversation like it was yesterday, even though it happened back in the 90s. She was a female friend that I found physically attractive, but I was seeing someone else at the time.

Well, I made the mistake of calling her cute. Which actually turned out to be a good thing. A learning experience.

I learned why cute is not something you want to call a girl you want to fuck.

She described cute as something you say to a child. “That kid is cute.”

Yeah, not something a grown woman wants to be called. Maybe if she’s a teenager.

A woman? No.

According to her of course since I’m not a woman.

So scratch cute off the list? What about the others?

Sexy? I’ve heard a beautiful woman tell me that she’d rather be called beautiful than sexy. Why? Her personal preference. Sexy implies you want to fuck her.

But what if you do want to fuck her?

I happen to love the word sexy. I’ll never give this word up. If I call you sexy, it’s because I think you’re quite fuckable. That’s a huge compliment from me, a man with higher standards than most.

Beautiful? You belong in a painting. I love beautiful. Folks overuse it though so I try to refrain from calling someone beautiful unless my mouth spouts it off before my brain can act.

Gorgeous? One of my favorite words of all-time. I love gorgeous women. Marilyn Monroe, Brigitte Bardot, and Monica Bellucci are all gorgeous. And of course, they’re all sexy.

So what’s the difference?

Very subtle. Sexy implies you want to fuck them.

Gorgeous? In my book, it ranks even higher than sexy. Sure, you still want to fuck them. But they can also model for you.

What is lovely vs striking?

John Updike wrote a story about three girls in bathing suits coming into the store he worked at. One of them he wanted to fuck and two of them he didn’t.

One of them, he immediately ruled out. Of the other of the two he didn’t want to fuck, he said that other girls would refer to her as “striking.” Which is almost a back-handed insult.

It comes across as a compliment. However, it’s really not because at best, striking girls are more attractive than unattractive girls but they’re still not attractive.

A striking girl is not beautiful. She’s just striking. Meaning at best, she’ll catch your attention. She better have a personality to really sell herself or else she’ll lose your attention pretty fast.

Now lovely on the other hand, I like lovely. If I call you lovely, I probably want you to model for one of my paintings. You’re beautiful. You may even be gorgeous.

I call a beautiful piece of music “lovely” as well. Tchaikovsky’s Serenade for Strings is lovely. It’s ranked #7 on my Tchaikovsky top ten list, which is pretty high considering how much I love Tchaikovsky.

Can you fuck lovely? Of course you can.

Can you fuck striking? Only if you’re really horny and you’re striking out, and can’t find someone better. Or the booze has lowered your standards. Or, like I said earlier, she has one hell of a personality.

Your thoughts

I’d love to open this to discussion. Including the ladies. Heck, especially the ladies.

Ladies, what would you like be called? Are you flattered by any of these words? Are you offended by any of these words?

For instance, L hated to be called cute. Hated it.

No, not offended. She’s pretty thick skinned and I don’t think I’ve ever offended her in all the times we’ve talked. (And we’ve talked in graphic details about all kinds of things, including sex). However, she saw herself as sexy and thought cute was a huge downgrade.

Men – what do you call a lover? What do you say to an attractive platonic friend that you’re strictly platonic with? Huge distinction here. One you want to fuck. The other one you don’t. But of course will fish for compliments.

I love words. I’m fascinated by them. It’s funny though because we all have our different definitions of words, and you may disagree with me 100% on each one of these words.

Which is great. More power to you. But, I want to hear why.

About the featured image

That’s Jin. I’ve painted her a few times and she’s also done a lot of other modeling work for me. Wonderful person.

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