You can’t be friends with everyone. Folks who even attempt that are fools and you and I both know this.
I had a friend from the 2000s. Got along with him great.
But he married a feminist. Then he started turning into one himself.
I remember going to some bullshit “art” performance with them and this 350 pound woman takes the stage and starts taking her clothes off. His wife went nuts. Absolutely nuts.
She started cheering like her football team just won the fucking Super Bowl.
Meanwhile, I was trying to keep my lunch down.
Fast forward years later, we’re at a party and comedy comes up. I didn’t tell anyone that I’m practicing my standup routine.
I don’t know who started this conversation but censoring comedy came up. And this feminist bitch flat out says that censoring comedy is a good thing because comedians shouldn’t offend anyone.
And like a typical beta male, he just smiled and nodded and agreed with his dumb wife (who by the way gained 50+ pounds since they got married. Surprise surprise).
They’re out. I simply won’t be friends with someone who thinks censoring comedy is a good thing. I won’t be friends with people who are fine with censoring art either. For obvious reasons.
Love who loves you back
Another common mistake folks make is they try to stay friends with people who either 1. don’t like them, 2. are indifferent about them.
I really like the band Tokio Hotel who has the song Love Who Loves You Back. It’s a good song. But the title nails it. If appreciation is one way, end it. Just like that.
Yes, it’s that easy.
If they don’t appreciate you, move on.
Someone who takes you for granted?
Let them go.
Someone who doesn’t even like you?
Let them go immediately.
This is something that schools get wrong. They try to train you to like everyone.
No. Don’t like everyone. Only like who deserves your like. Your heart isn’t infinite. Save it for someone who gives a flying fuck about you.
Same thing with your wallet.
I recently bought someone dinner. That person is so socially awkward that he didn’t even say “thank you.” Needless to say, that was a one time thing. Social skills are like any other skill. Learn it. Or get left behind.
On the lighter side, all four of my models are awesome people. Sure, I barely know Diana. But so far, I really like her as a person.
There are cues you can pick up. Look how they treat other people. Look for red flags like entitlement mentality or the reverse – superiority mentality. Like for instance, if they treat the waiter like shit, that’s superiority mentality. Fuck that person. Not worth having in your life.
Now good tells – their eye contact with you is solid. They smile. They’re appreciative. They’re grateful. They’re kind. They have your basic social skills. They’re clean. They wash their hands after going to the bathroom. They clean up after themselves. They say “thank you” if you buy them a drink or dinner. They offer something in return.
They’re fun to be around. I fucking love people who are a blast to be around.
They’re funny. I love people with good senses of humor.
My wife and I have a good friend of ours who’s polar opposites with us politically. But you know what? So what? He simply sees the world thru a different lens.
However, he’s gracious. He’s welcoming. And he’s funny.
He makes you feel at home when you go over to his house.
These are all good tells. These are people we enjoy being around.